Your married life should be fun and full of adventures. You and your spouse have a lot to figure out, but what matters is your love for each other. Even though you don’t have much, you know there’s room to grow. However, when you receive the news that your in-laws are coming to visit, everything in the household seems to warrant a second look. Why did you buy that quirky lamp, and why did you not spend more on lawn maintenance?
Before you stress over the things your in-laws might not like about your marriage, remember that you can do these:
Delegate and Prioritize
You don’t need to grow extra arms to get everything done in time for their arrival. Your in-laws are humans, too, and they have human limitations just like you. They will not be here in a flash–and even if they can teleport themselves into your doorstep, if you get help from window-cleaning companies or lawn-mowing services in Seattle, you can focus on food preparation and other essential tasks to tidy up the place. Your mother-in-law would want the windows and lawn in pristine condition, but she will not care how you do it. When it comes to the food that you serve, however, she might be more critical, which is why you should devote more attention to this. Take time to practice, especially if you’re attempting a family recipe.
Get Help from Your Spouse
It’s a stressful situation, but it doesn’t have to be. You have someone on your side with enough knowledge to help you dodge a bullet: your spouse. Your in-laws are your partner’s parents, which means they have known each other for years. Ask your spouse how best to deal with their parents in any given situation. Knowing your mother-in-law’s favorite flowers and scents, for instance, will help you get her in a good mood as soon as she steps into your home. Ask about her favorite recipes and how she likes her toast in the morning. Use what you’ve learned from getting to know her before the marriage, as well. Wives and mothers-in-law don’t have to subscribe to the idea that they can’t get along; if you have made a good enough impression for her to approve your union, you shouldn’t have to fear that she’ll break up the marriage when she doesn’t like how you do the laundry.
Hold Your Ground
You grew up in a household that might be the complete opposite of how your spouse was raised. From both your backgrounds, you and your mother-in-law might have different approaches to certain situations. You don’t have to do everything she wants, especially when it comes to raising your children. However, you don’t have to be rude either. Ask for her advice on things you genuinely know nothing about, but learn to say no when she suggests things that you know will not work for your family. She’ll eventually learn to respect your decisions, but if you fold to whatever she demands, that will not make her love you more. It will only show that you don’t know how to stand your ground.
Your mother-in-law’s first visit can be a test of your limits. Show her your best, but don’t let her dictate how you run the household.